If prosperity's first step is humility, then calamity begins with envy. Humility places others in higher regard than ourselves and opposes selfish ambition.
Envy pushes us to elevate ourselves above others. Envious hearts direct actions that will absolutely result in disaster for you and anyone depending on you. Envy drives us to achieve things we were never intended to achieve. Envy drains our peace, energy, and happiness.
You were not designed to rule over people, to run someone else's race, or to have someone else's life. You were designed to put your gifts and talents to work helping others. You were built for a challenge only you can overcome. You're built for a life far better than any you could copy. Fulfilling your own purpose refreshes, energizes, and increases joy in your life.
If your decisions are hurting you more than helping, stop what you're doing and ask God for help. Read James Chapter 3, and ask God to show you the steps to get on track fulfilling the purpose He designed in you.